This all sort of started when I found myself with a fistful of skittles at my desk in the not too distant past. (Last week)
I’m sitting there stuffing my face with what feels like contraband. I bought it in a vending machine. It was my second trip of the day. I’m officially shaming myself and owning up to it. Even though most people in this country are like “yeah, and…?” Some of you may be into food. Good food. Real good food. And you know what I’m talking about.
Well, hello, I’m Monika, co-founder of Saucy by Nature, maker of the fine all natural preservative free farm fresh sauce you’re slathering on to be healthy and promote the good food movement. I’ve probably actually personally schlepped my ass at 4am to the Hunts Point wholesale farmers market to hand-lug 400 lbs of those fresh picked tomatoes myself. And somehow now I’m sitting here debating which order to eat these delicious/awful 5000 year shelf life vending machine goodies, and how best to consume all the orange ones first so that I’m left with the perfect combo of purple and red at the end?!
It’s definitely not the first time in my life that I’ve thought “ohmigod, what have I done?!” (Err, especially since starting this company and also if you count my 20s)
It’s not just that, though.
Somewhere between “let’s start an awesome food company!” and “skittles in my face”, I seem to have unraveled a bit. Just 7 months ago I was fun, working out, generally presentable, chilled out, and on my way to growing a successful Feng Shui consulting business while doing freelance attorney work. I had it pretty much together. I vacationed, shopped, did dinners and drinks with friends, had friends, and even dated. I worked out, meditated, studied holistic healing techniques, slept, ate a balanced diet, watched loads of Bravo TV, all the good stuff.
I don’t know if this happens to everyone who starts a company, or if other food producers know what I’m talking about, but my life feels as though I’ve lost all control and none of the above items exist anymore. I’ve completed derailed somehow. I eat crap, feel uhealthy and flubby, I’ve gotten sick to the point of bedridden, I haven’t cleaned my apt in ages, my bedroom looks like my closet and office threw up on each other, I rarely do laundry, I work 18 hour days, my roommates hate me, I have very few friends who still have the patience to deal with me, and I pretty much feel and look like a zombie most days.
In short, I’m a hot mess. And it’s time for an overhaul.
Entre this blog. I’m embarking on an exploration of finding balance and joy in my life again, feeling great, getting hot, and most importantly, taking advantage of all the fabulous resources at my fingertips in NYC.
I’m already lit up by the possibilities and challenges of eating local nutrient-rich foods on the go, cleansing my system of the, er, less productive things I’ve been doing to it, and creating a sense of balance and serenity as I attempt to crawl out of the new-company-startup tornado that is my life.
Join me in my expose of discovery through nourishing my body, nurturing my soul, and stepping away from the vending machine.